Ever played a stupid game? When I was about 17, I went over on my bike to my grandma and grandpa’s house to see my favorite cousins, Timmy and Patty. The place was quite old and had been in the family for generations. There were some remains of a past age in the yard, like an old wash-stand and a carpet beater.
Timmy took hold of the carpet beater.
“You know,” he said, giving it a swish. “I reckon this is what grandpa used to get his butt swatted with when he was a boy. Reckon I remember him telling me.”
“Wow! I bet that hurt,” I said, taking the carpet beater and tapping it on my hand. “Reckon he must’ve been tougher than us.”
“I dare you to take a swat, Timmy,” said Patty, grinning sassily at her brother.
“I will if you will,” said Timmy. “Just one swat each. Just to see.”
“OK,” I said, going along with the stupidity and a chance to give my cousin a spank on his cute backside. “Bend over the washstand then.”
Jimmy put his hands on the washstand and bent slightly over to tighten his jeans a little. I lined up the carpet beater and swung it.
“Ow!” yelled my cousin as his faced creased in agony. He stumbled round holding his behind as Patty and me practically collapsed laughing at his anguish. Nothing like someone else getting a spank to make one laugh!
“Did it hurt?” I giggled.
“You could say that!” said my cousin, red-faced. “Come on! Your turn now!”
I didn’t realise that I would feature next but, stupidity being what it was, handed the carpet beater to Timmy and bent over the wash-stand. I had a horrible sense of anticipation as he tapped it on my bottom, and in a moment of panic I ran away. However, he chided me about being a coward and I had no wish to be, so I took my place again with my butt in line. I held my breath as the carpet beater sped through the air.
“Owwweeeeeeeee!!!” I yelled.
Oh boy, did it hurt! It was like being branded with several hot irons at once. I jumped up and down holding my butt as my cousins’ faces showed their merriment at my agony. For a few minutes I could do nothing but run and jump as I tried to get rid of the burning sensation.
I then looked at Patty who was giggling like a drain.
“Now you!” I said. “You’re not getting away with it!”
“Noooooo!” said Patty pleadingly, but Timmy grabbed her and held her in position over the wash-stand while I swung the carpet beater.
Now it was Patty’s turn to yell and jump around, much to Timmy and my amusement. She even shed a few tears as I hugged her. We all agreed that if grandpa had been spanked by that carpet beater, he must’ve been a much tougher nut than we were.
Looking back, it was of course the most stupid game to play and left us all with very sore bottoms to sit on as we had tea with granny and grandpa. We just hoped they didn’t see us wriggling. I also had to ride my bicycle home sitting on a very sore bottom on the saddle!
One thing we were sure of; they sure made them tough in grandpa’s time.