I remember one occasion when I was about 12 and had been warned by my mum several times not to play with my ‘Action Man’ near the fireplace in case I knocked one of her ornaments off the shelf.

Well, I ignored her warning and knocked off a vase that smashed on the floor. My mum was furious and I knew I was in big trouble. Normally, I would be sent to my bedroom for a smacked bottom, but mum was so angry she grabbed my arm, smacking my bottom as she pulled out the dining room chair. She whipped down my shorts and pants, sitting down to pull up her skirt and hauling me across her bare thighs to secure me across her lap for a smacked bare bottom.

I was soon kicking my legs as she smacked my bum, my shorts and pants flying off to the floor.

“You naughty, naughty boy!” She said as she continued to spank me. “I told you not to play near the fireplace and now my vase is broken.”

I was now crying like a naughty 8 year and talking in child mode, as you always do when across your mum’s knee, no matter what age.

“Sorry mummy, I didn’t mean to. Mummy, please!”

Now the tops of my thighs were being smacked and the tears were really flowing. Suddenly, the doorbell rang and my mum stopped. It was then I felt the warmth and comfort of my mum’s bare thighs and the heat in my bottom.

I thought I would be sent straight up to bed but was sent to the corner of the room and told not to move. My mum went to answer the door and I could hear another woman’s voice. To my horror, it was my auntie Shirley who was now coming into the house chatting to my mum. I was mortified as she entered the kitchen to see me standing in the corner, my red sore bottom on show.

“Someone been a naughty boy, Joan,” she said to my mum.

My mum replied, “Yes, very,” then explained about the vase and said she would make auntie a cup of tea as soon as she had finished with me.

“Don’t worry, Joan. You carry on.”

I tried not to look at my auntie as my mum called me back over to her. I was hauled back over my mum’s bare thighs and the smacking began again. As much as I tried to be a big boy in front my auntie Shirley, I was soon back in child mode and was crying and telling mummy how sorry I was. Finally, after another good smacked bottom, mum stopped but kept me over her lap as she spoke to my auntie.

“You could fry an egg on that bottom, Joan.” Auntie said to my mum.

“You might have to do this next time you look after him, if he is naughty boy.”

“I must admit, Joan, he is normally a very good boy when he comes to stay with me. But don’t worry, if he is a naughty boy he will be across my knee for a smacked bottom.”

“Well, you have my blessing to do so.”

I could not believe what I had just listened to. Then mum slapped my bottom, telling me to get myself upstairs, get my pyjamas on and into bed. My face was as red as my bottom as I went upstairs.